Expressing our needs and Vulnerabilities in a climate of Autonomy

In this American paradigm our values of autonomy and individuation generates the idea that getting our needs met is seen as a solo endeavor that requires hard work and usually struggle. In general we view successfully fulfilling our needs to require strategy, perseverance and commitment. It is novel for us to think that we deserve our needs met for no other reason than we need our needs met. It really can be that easy.  Although, through this celebration of self-sufficiency Americans have inadvertently constructed tribulation into our way of life. Fortunately through practices like Nonviolent Communication the beggar association being labeled with the request of a need is removed. In this practice one sees all peoples needs to be of worth.  A paradigm shift occurs in the adherent of NVC, in which they understand getting their needs met does not require strife. Making the request for their needs to be met is neither an indignant nor an egoic action, but just necessary in order for anyone to live a fulfilled life. Through this process, there is deconstruction of the ingrained outlook that needs are something to be tackled by oneself. There tends to be a state of struggle within the situation of pursuing through another a need fulfillment. It could be a psychological struggle to strategize how they are going to coerce another person to grant their need, or an emotional struggle with anticipating how receptive the person will be, or how they  will be perceived once they try to get their need met through this person. NVC simplifies this situation, due to its basis that we all have needs and we all deserve them to be met. Through this vantage point it is easy for an individual to empathize with the need that is being requested of them, they don’t necessarily need to fulfill the need, but they can understand that it is coming from a place that is common amongst all of us.

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